I had this dream and for some reason trying to recount it came out in this format.
Back to Index

-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
You're in a miserable, dusty, underground area. You live here as do countless others.


You, Gil, and Myron, enter the cafe. You see Linn sitting in his usual spot in the corner, overcome with some sort of emotion. His hand is over his face and he's moaning to himself. Cyrus and Clair are in their usual seats - but they, like so many others, refuse to look in your direction. You aren't surprised at this point, but still frustrated.

You hear a light thud beside you, and turn to see Gil collapsed on the ground. "I'm done, I'm giving up, I'm staying here" you imagine him saying, but he didn't even give you that. You look at him crumpled beside you and Myron, and it slowly sinks in that he isn't just taking a break. He is completely still. A miserable, confused fury builds up in you.

"Gillllllllllllllll..." you look up and see that Linn has tilted his head back towards the wall, but still is covering his face. He refuses to look but still somehow seems to know his friend has dropped dead in front of him.

You catch Cyrus moving in the corner of your eye, just as he slams his fist into the table. He quickly stands up, and just for a second, you lock eyes. It's the most you have gotten from anyone in so long; you feel a sadness once the gaze has broken, as he storms out.

Linn and Clair are still in their spots. You can hear Linn quietly weep as Clair stares intensely at the drink in her hand. You feel that there's nothing good to come of staying, and make your way out of the cafe entrance. Myron follows you. You instinctively question when you don't hear Gil's footsteps, but catch yourself before you turn to check. How could you immediately make that mistake?

You and Myron walk in silence for some time. You stop. Myron quietly says your name. You turn to him, and his appearance concerns you. He was always bigger than you, and now he's so small and fragile looking. He's hunched over in obvious pain. He's somehow bloated but dehydrated. His skin is dry and cracked, but he's drenched in sweat and oil. Myron looks up at you, with unexpectedly serene eyes.

"I think....I think I'm good here." Myron says with a small smile. It's forced, but also has some relief behind it. You don't say anything. Your heart is breaking, seeing your friend in pain. You would be so sad to lose him, you think. Myron starts to lower himself. As he sticks his arm out for balance, you grab and hold his hand to help him descend more gently. You didn't want him to sit down, but here you are helping him do so.

The two of you reside in silence for some time. Staring at the darkness in the distance, occasionally glancing at each other.

You don't know exactly when it happened. You just realized, at some point, your friend was no longer there. His posture gradually weakened, until he was leaning against a rock, until he was essentially laying down. But you can't say for certain when Myro...n...

Eventually, you decide to keep walking. You don't even know where you're going. While you're wandering, you instinctively avoid going into the darkness. Even though you've considered just running into it before, you feel deep down it's dangerous, and won't do it.

You wander aimlessly, bouncing around between lights. You don't come particularly close to anyone, and the people you get somewhat near ignore you. You wonder where Cyrus ran off to. You wonder if Linn has calmed down. You wonder what Clair is thinking behind that stone exterior.

You wonder where Gil is. You wonder if he's scared. You wonder if you shouldn't have left Myron. You wonder if you should have talked to him, instead of sitting in silence. You think of that poor creature you saw years ago. You don't really know what you could have done, but you wish you could have shown it some sort of kindness.

Eventually you find yourself on the outskirts of the camp. You've spent a lot of time here. The comfort of others nearby, but the freedom to stare out into the darkness. Suddenly, your knee gives, and you realize at the same time just how tired you are.

FIGHT IT
ACCEPT IT